Saturday, April 30, 2011
A Son's Inspiration
I have slowly made my way around the circumference of Father’s mountain. I have been privileged to have been called several times to climb its slopes, but I have never made a trip around it. Stopping and taking a firm grasp of my staff I gazed intently upward. Father’s mountain is very tall and quite steep in places. It is not so steep however that I cannot see the clouds surrounding the summit of this mountain nor hide the sound of the rumble cascading in a holy divine echo amongst its ravines and rocky formations.
I have been waiting on my Lord and my God for some time now as I have slowly made my around this holy and most ancient of places. Rounding a corner I could detect a bright light glowing in the distance. Even at the great distance it is from me I can feel the holiness of God radiating from it. It is very far away but the light is brighter than the noontime sun on earth.
Somehow I know by the intuition of my spirit I am going into uncharted territory for me. My spirit is filled with joy at the sight of it. I began to make my way towards it and with each step I take the ground under my feet feel more and more holy. I was able to take only a few more steps and my legs began to tremble so much that I fell on my knees.
This great light is leading me not away from Fathers Mountain but is on the contrary located, or so it seems to me along the base of the mountain further ahead. I lifted my eyes upward and took in with a glance the wonder of the glory of God that rests on this mountain. Hot tears began to flow down my cheeks and I became intensely aware of my many shortcomings.
“Father I do not understand why you have called me here my Lord. I am the least worthy of all your saints. My body has been undergoing intense suffering in the last few weeks. I have felt the oppressive hand of the spirit of death clutching at my heart once more. Yet you have a purpose for me my God and I this day give myself over to you.
I have not the strength in the natural body to proceed and my spirit is in need of divine revelation from you.
I have learned many things in my sojourn through life and although I am weak yet like Paul I shall boast of my weaknesses. Take my heart holy one I long to be freed from the shackles imposed upon me by my soul and my body. Make of me a man who others may perceive your presence my Lord. Help me my God to be a witness of your glory and to lay down my life as a living sacrifice.
If my body is ordained to slowly dwindle away through sickness and the relentless attacks of the spirit of death; I gladly offer it to you my Father. I do not find my life so precious a commodity anymore. I offer it and all that I am in your service holy one.
Yet as I look at myself I am no different than any other man. I am not only sick in body but bound by the same afflictions and weaknesses of my flesh as any other man. I offer, such as it is, to you my Lord all that I am. I can do no other”.
Having said this I pitched forward on my face and began to weep. I am totally and completely spent at the moment and find myself without the inner resources to continue my journey. I can feel the light in the distance reaching out to me. Yet here I shall lie. I am seeing myself in the full light of the glory radiating both from the mountain at whose base I find myself, and the light in the distance.
I am having at the moment a similar experience as the prophet Isaiah spoke of I am a man who in the crossfire of the twin sources of divine glory I feel reaching out to me as weak and undone. I began to shake under the power and anointing of this place. I suppose I should have laid there forever. Yet I can hear the sounds of approaching footsteps.
In my weakened state I do not even have the strength to raise my head to see who it is. So I lay on the ground in an agony of suspense hearing the approaching footsteps get closer and closer. This unknown person has stopped right in front of me. Strong loving arms reached down and in one motion both turned me over and sitting down on the ground beside me took me in his arms.
Looking up I had to close my eyes once more because I realized at once that the source of the great light I had been seeing in the distance was this person who was holding me. I recognized him at once as the master. My Lord and my God and yet though I am overwhelmed as always by the sight of him I am too weak to do anything but lay here.
A warm loving smile beamed down upon me and I drew strength from the love that I could see in his eyes. Almost at the same moment tears formed in the corners of his eyes.
“Michael my son”, he said. You have been attacked over and over again in recent days but the evil one shall not be allowed to prevail”.
Then to my astonishment Jesus stood to his feet and reached down and picked me up in his arms. I felt like a small child as he held me and he began to walk back in the direction from which he had just come. I laid my head on his shoulder and we traveled in silence.
I began to silently sob as I was made aware of the safety and security I felt in his arms as he carried me. After some little time we came to the entrance to a small cave nestled at the foot of Father’s mountain and as we passed through the entrance to the cave I knew in my spirit we had crossed over a barrier of some kind.
I did not have long to reflect upon this new found knowledge for Jesus walked across the cave and laid me down on a cot nestled in the corner of the cave. I can see a warm cheery fire burning in that same corner. I am lying on the cot almost unable to move as I followed the master with my eyes as he walked back across the room.
He took off his robe and laid it on a chair. He was now wearing a simple white tunic that he had on underneath. The chair was one of two that were placed around a small table upon which was a small basin and a jug of water, which he proceeded to pour into the bowl. Picking up a small white towel he made his way back over to me.
He placed the basin of water on the ground and held the towel tightly in his hand. His expression is one of grief and great sadness. He then placed his hand on my eyes and almost in that same moment uttered the words. “Be opened”
To my horror and astonishment I saw myself as I really was. I knew the last few months have been very hard for me and now I could see why. I was covered from head to toe with wounds. Jesus helped me sit up with the aid of a small pillow he placed at my back that had been lying on the cot. I have been wounded what looks like to me dozens of times by the darts of hell.
I am literally covered with these wounds. I saw that not all of the darts were gone as I saw several protruding from my spirit body. Having shown me my true condition Jesus laid my head back down on the pillow. He very gently but purposely extracted the arrows one by one.
As he pulled them out they burned like fire but I felt an intense sense of relief that followed in the wake of his having done so. Having extracted the last of them he turned back to me and looked at me with his dark blue searching eyes. At the moment they display a look of compassion and concern.
He said, “You shall learn many things in the next few days my son. The arrows of the enemy are like Satan himself. They wound but do so in a way that brings confusion, pain, and suffering in their wake.”
He put his hand gently on my forehead while his other hand took my hand in his. For a long moment he just sat there and I could feel his strength radiating through me.
“Michael the thing you must see is the arrows of the evil one wound in a way far more diabolical than you have seen. The arrows or darts are never seen for what they really are. Yet there effects upon a believer are quite real. You until I prayed for your eyes had no idea you were wounded. I could have healed you with a word my son but I preferred to do it this way”.
Then he leaned forward until his face and eyes were but inches from mine.
“If I was willing to wash my disciple’s feet I am more than willing to take care of you my son and wash your wounds”.
He then placed the basin of water on the corner of the cot and dipping the towel in the water began to wash my wounds. He washed each wound individually and then placed his hand on that wound and the open scab was healed. He proceeded to wash and cleanse each wound in its turn and laid his hand on each one and as he did so it was healed.
I had so many wounds all over my body that it took quite some little time to treat them all. Having cleansed me in the front he then turned me over and proceeded to repeat the process as he cleansed and healed the wounds on my back.
Having finished this project he walked back over to the table poured the water out on the floor of the cave and proceeded to put his robe back on. He then began to form some flour into cakes and soon had several small cakes of bread roasting on the fire.
He walked over to the wall and picking up a wineskin walked back over to my cot. Placing his hands under my head he raised me up to drink. Having done this he sat down beside me on the floor by the cot and spoke to me.
“Son, I came to die, to give my life as a sacrifice for the sins of the entire world. Yet humanity is entering its darkest days. It is for this time that you and many others were born. The evil one has once more attempted to kill and stop the plan Father and I have for your life”.
Having said this he reached over and took my hand once more.
“Son nothing from whatever source shall be allowed to stop that which Father and I have planned for your life. Yet today you must rest”.
He stood to his feet and walked back over to the fire where the delightful scent of the manna he had prepared for us was filling the cave. Taking the cakes off the fire he placed them on the table. Yet he reached over and taking one loaf made his way over to me. He then proceeded to feed me and my spirit is feeling revived already from the strength the bread and wine have given me.
“Rest now my son for we have far to go and you shall see that all you have suffered shall be worth the price for the revelation you shall receive shall carry you all the rest of your days. You shall walk in my strength”.
Having said this he rose and I could hear him busily moving around the cave and as I lay on my cot in utter astonishment over all that had just happened. He could have as he said healed me with a word, but he wanted to make it personal. He wanted to establish a new deeper connection between us. I also know that whatever comes I remain in his hands.